Back to this blog since I am now literally in a different state of mind.
The last lemons I got makes me learn and noticing my body thoroughly. Especially about the sensation that coming up everytime I feel a particular emotion. Like nausea in my throat every time I'm sad and crying deeply. Not to mention, I can now predict my emotions based on my period cycle. Whenever I feel like to munch everything in front of me or just starting to feel like alpha and flirty.
These days, I've been looking for smitten feelings since I release my bad emotions. I enjoy the butterflies on my tummy. It's bringing back my sophomore or even my puberty era energy. Surprisingly I can maintain the feelings to make it borderline. Exciting for life but rational enough not to put too much hope on my wishing basket. Sabrina Carpenter's explicit songs are starting to replace my Taylor Swift playlist. Juno is playing on repeat with its catchy romcom intro and horny lyrics combined. I can't not laugh with the idea of me feeling like liking someone again. Not that fall fall but attracted. Even I add a box more to tick on my type, fit (include a quite muscular one). LOL
Yep, I do work out much. It helps me to clear my mind pluuuus I love my body more. My tiny muscles are starting to appear here and there and I am so excited of that. Yippie! (Um, did I mention about those muscular gym crushes at the gym? 👀)
On a side note, talking about a bigger picture of this phase, I think to letting go is the one of the points I need to learn. Started from Eyang who left for eternity, the one who I should let go since the early days, and lastly Nadya who was being my pillar on this phase to spread her wings to Bali. So, I surrender and I have learnt my lesson.
Well, life's good so far. I enjoys the days I spend with friends and communities here in Bandung. I feel loved and seen. The highlight is now I need to reevaluate my habit to make everything in balance especially for Geekgo works. The art bugs begin to show and I don't want to miss it.
See ya!
